“You’re leaving? Why?”
I imagined how his looks will be like the moment I have to tell him about the man I choose to love ; and it’s not him.
What the man I love offers was enticing – riches, pleasures and a secured future. Most of these I didn’t get to find the luxury to enjoy yet. That is because I’m not sure if he loves me – the simplest yet most important reason why a woman should stay in a relationship.
“Aren’t you satisfied with what we have?”
He nailed it right, but I didn’t have the guts to tell. He gave me time and affection, yes, but it seems it’s only a portion of what he has. Sometimes I doubt if the romance we shared was real, for somehow it seems artificial. I feel as if I am left with the remains of his heart and the other pieces could be with his other beloved.
“Do you still love me?”
He added another query after I gave him no answers. My unspoken response is that I did, however it saddens me that he didn’t choose to love me in the first place. If he wants to be with me, why doesn’t he want to have me? If he knows that I love him, why not confirm that he loves me?
My saying yes wouldn’t change a thing.
“Hey, don’t say goodbye.” The Man I Choose to Love shook my shoulder, I’ve been absorbed in this mental rehearsal going on in my head, thinking about the guy I’m with whom I should call soon as the man I used to love.
“He won’t let you go if you did.” He reminded me that I should just walk away and leave the man I love without a word. He held my hand tightly, as if giving me the assurance that going with the man who loves me is the best decision I can make.
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