When Love Becomes a Choice

If I’m offered ice cream or donuts every day, three things might happen to me. First, I might gain weight by taking ice cream and donuts alternately for consecutive days.  Second, I may manage to keep things in moderation and just let biting on them be part of my daily options.  Third, I may consume at my heart’s content but at some point be disgusted by it.  Seeing and tasting them (thought there’s different flavors to try) every day can be boring. The presence of my two sweet indulgences can lead to any of these end results.

Favourite: Krispy Kreme Original Glazed
Favourite: Krispy Kreme Original Glazed

What if life is limited with choices like ice cream and donuts?  I’m not referring to deserts this time but maybe ideas or opportunities, or sweet things in front of you in which you are offered and asked to choose.  Will you find contentment with what is available?  Will you innovate your own donut ice cream? Or maybe ignore this crazy idea in the first place?

Hold on a second.  Don’t just close this page yet. You may be excited to hear about thoughts of love – that mushy romantic feeling which the title of this blog post made you feel.  We’re getting there. I’m just curious of how interested you’d still be after reading about ice cream and donuts.  I love them!  The mere sight of my sweethearts just tempts me to forget my diet.


Am I right to assume that if you want to have something, you’ll wait for it?  Love can be measured by how much you are willing to endure just to get it, right?.  Most of the time, it delights in the slow unfolding of events because this is how you’ll appreciate it more.  It can also give us reason to boast as we worked hard for what we have achieved –  to prove ourselves worthy of the love we aspire to have or give.

I am not part of the Millenia generation, who were said to be fond of selfies and instant gratification but I can still identify with them.  There are times I’m impulsive in buying the pair of shoes when it’s love at first sight. I can’t stand waiting in long lines for JCo donuts and would only buy when the store opens so that I’m the first customer to be served.  I disliked waiting.  Well, do you like to wait for anything anyway? Maybe for something I really really really like to have, I’d give a YES.  My second condition will be, it has to be time bound.  Hey, I can’t wait forever to enjoy that dream escapade!  I need to be experiencing that travel package while I’m still young.

The Missing Link

I guess you’ll only be patient with something when you are attracted to it.  A better term would be “connected.”  Definitely, you are patient with your siblings because they are your relatives.  You’ll be patient with studying because your grades depend on it.  You are patient with your job because it helps pay your bills.

Note that I am using the word attracted, and connected than the word love because there is still a missing link.  Let me expound what I mean.

I can say I’m inclined or drawn to arts – but can’t say I love it; because I did not have  sufficient experience with it.  I’m interested with it because I draw, and I like to paint in the future.   But it hasn’t made me feel a certain attachment with it which can be qualified as an awesome experience.

On the other hand, I love music.  I spent many nights learning my guitar back in college.  I was happy the moment I was able to play one full song.  Playing the piano with a band for an event gave me the adrenaline rush.  Writing songs comforts me whenever I’m heart-broken; and I feel alive whenever I sing.  Call my affair with music as passion.   I would like to call that love. The missing link I was referring to that separates attraction with love is time and effort.. and the beautiful experience which happens when you pour out your heart into it. 

How much do you invest yourself in your passions or people important to you?  Has there been a way for you to connect yourself with people that you love? Do you still have time for love?

The Dreaded Word

The only way to sustain any type of relationship, even if it’s something we are most passionate about is commitment.  And I’m not just talking about one person committed to a cause or a course of action.  It takes two to tango, and it’s a two way thing.  The reason why this “C” word has been a dreaded by some is because the levels of commitments with their former relationships did not match.  It hurts to fail at a time when you are expecting to have someone watch your back.  It’s painful to be left hanging or have different sets of unmet expectations. This can be applicable to romantic relationships, business, and employment etcetera.  There should be constant give and take.  You may call it adjustments and reciprocation.  Again, I call that love.

I’d like to believe that LOVE is only real when it becomes a choice.  We choose to stick with it no matter what the cost because there will be hurdles and obstacles in the journey.  Love is like walking through a road where there is no turning back.  And yes, until now, the idea of no turning back scares me.


The only comforting truth that I hold on to is that there is a God who loves me more and will never leave me whichever path I take.  My commitment should be to Him first and foremost because He holds my future.  He knows my past completely and understands my present situation.  If there is a partnership worth investing that can affect all other areas of our lives – that’s with Him.  And it takes a deeper knowledge and experience of Him to enjoy that relationship so that we can say that we truly loved.

What will you choose?

If I see the donuts and ice cream again, I can get some because I love them.  I feel a childlike happiness when they touch my taste buds and I have good memories of these deserts.  But I love myself more so I’ll eat in moderation.  It will take discipline to maintain my figure.  Yeah, my Coffee Crumble and Alcapone,  I’ll just have you when I want you.   😛

Related Reads: Free to Love


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